Have you ever heard of the quote, “The way we talk to our children becomes their inner voice?” This quote is a little daunting to me personally, because I don’t always talk in the kindest ways to them. We need God’s help daily to fill up our hearts with His words, His thoughts, His peace. Because out of the overflow of our hearts, the mouth speaks.
What do we fill our hearts with?
If our hearts are filled with fear and paranoia, our words will repeatedly sound like this.
“DO NOT forget to wash your hands and put on your mask, or else you will get sick”
“Do you know how many people died from this virus?”
“NEVER EVER do this and that, or else this (insert terrible things) will happen”
When our hearts are filled with comparison and negativity, our words will sound like this.
“How could you do this to me? We sacrificed everything for you.”
“How many times did I tell you not to do this? I am so disappointed at you”
“Look at so and so, they studied twice as hard as you, they have better grades than you, etc.”
In Colossians 4:6, we are called to act wisely towards outsiders (even more so towards our own children), so we can make most of every opportunity. This passage encourages us to let our words be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that we may know how to respond to everyone.
To make the most out of every opportunity with our children,
Our hearts must first be filled with FAITH not fear, LIFE and not lack, HOPE of the future, not discouragement of this moment.
We need to see them from God’s perspective, the person they will BECOME,
and not the person they are right now, full of flaws and imperfections.
Hearts full of faith (not fear) will continue to speak LIFE into their hearts.
“WOW, the COVID case is on the rise out there, but you know what? God is in control”
“Our God is bigger than this virus! So even if we get sick, Jesus can and He WILL heal us!”
“This war in Ukraine is really scary, I am scared too. But you know what? Let’s pray together for them. Our God is able to do exceedingly and abundantly more than we can ever think or ask for! He will save the people in Ukraine!”
“Your test looks really hard and I know you are nervous. Let me pray for God’s wisdom and anointing to be upon you! You can nail this!”
"Oh no, I'm so sorry you did that. That's ok. Everybody makes mistakes. Let's think of a way to overcome this."
Hearts full of HOPE (not discontentment and comparison) will continue to speak life to them.
“I know you are struggling in this area right now, but this is not the end of it. I can see that God is going to turn this weakness into strength. You will be used mightily by Him to bless many people”
“It’s okay to make mistakes, mom and dad make mistakes too. Aren’t we glad we have a perfect God who never makes mistakes? Let’s go try again, I know you can do it.”
“Don’t be discouraged. Tomorrow will be a better day, I promise!”
I know for some of us, this is unnatural and definitely out of our comfort zone.
However, we need to continue practicing and perfecting the art of speaking life to our children.
We have to use every opportunity to point them to Christ.
Our words will become their inner voice.
Our actions will become theirs.